A New Face

LDSWell seeing as its Wednesday that meant that the Missionaries where back again today, and seem’s the one who we started with has moved on to another location (been reassigned – his calling changed) so we have this new fellow also from the states and tall standing 6’5″ so ya he’s up there in height, though to look at him nothing says strength or anything sadly first impression of him is unsure and you can tell that being tall isn’t something he’s comfortable with because of how he was holding himself and how he stood (like he grew faster that he hasn’t developed confidence in his frame – could also be the whole just starting your mission issues going on, but not all of it is that).

At any rate, like last time one of the first things that was on the topic for today was what had been left off with last time, the subject of my baptism ::shakes head:: yes I’ve given it thought, and yes I’ve prayed and what have you. I still have the same answers going on in my brain and feelings in my heart, those things have not changed and I’m not expecting them to do so (if they do they do, if they don’t they don’t). They did bring up the whole getting sealed in the temple side of things that can happen after this takes place so that N and I can be together even in death (something which I already believe to be the case outside of the religious aspect of things being part of it).

Also the topic of the day was Chastity which as N knows full well I found really funny on many levels since well all the things that they had to talk about we’ve talked about long before we got married and long before we connected in person, plus being Asexual some of it just doesn’t apply on any level that they will ever understand (or at least it would be a while for them to understand it if they even could rap their heads around it).

Though I totally disagree with it the part of the statement “It is ordained of God for the creation of children” sorry not buying that on ANY level since I know full well that there are many women around the world who are unable to have children for what ever reason (who deeply won’t to have one) and that there are those of us like myself and N who have chosen NOT to have them (that and we can’t). I can understand how it is believed that children and sex are tied together and what not, but oi oi oi that is such an out dated belief system. Though I think the whole deal of “You will not get an abortion” line that the missionary said was one that if I could would get my blood boiling since I believe 100% that every woman needs to do what is right for their body and their life and health, regardless of what some religion says.

I do find it funny though, that under the charity thing that looking at porn and self pleasure are considered to be something you don’t do – all I’ll say on the matter is what ever floats your boat. Why? simple neither of those two things are things I think about or worry about nor have I worried about because they just don’t interest me. Never have and can’t seeing that ever really being the case for that matter (guess you can say its part of the whole asexual side of things coming into play here), so not an issue on any level.

::Chuckles:: one thing that really caught me trying NOT to laugh was the following that was read to us… In addition to reserving sexual intimacy for marriage, we obey the law of chastity by controlling our thoughts, words, and actions. Jesus Christ taught,“Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: but I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart” Why? again here comes the asexual side of things into the picture when it comes to my thinking. I can’t imagine looking at either gender and having a sexual thought about either of them, regardless of who they are. Sorry but since I haven’t even though of N in this manner just if a form thought to me, I know other’s can and do have such thoughts its just not something that is part of my being and never had been and in all truth I can’t see it being since it implies a sexual attraction at some level for it to even happen.

What though I do find funny, is that poly was part of the founding of the religion, yet its not even in the current writings which go at length to say Man and Woman only, no sex outside of the marriage, etc. Yet that wasn’t part of how things use to be in the past, and for an off shoot of the LDS it is part of how things are, yet both say their are true to their founder. I’ll say that with time things change and with change things grow and more forwards but to say that it never happened or to not say it was part just makes one wonder about things to various degrees.

The other that was discussed was The Word of Wisdom, which I already knew of with since its one of the first things N brought up after we connected and I’d to degree heard of long before meeting N and way before now. Though I don’t agree with some of the stuff in the Word of Wisdom, it is what it is. The top areas that are to be avoided according to the Words of Wisdom are Alcohol, Tobacco, Coffee and tea, Illegal drugs and Other harmful or addictive substances. Not really an issue all in all, since for myself Alcohol has never been part of my life nor has Tobacco and illegal drugs are all things that have never been part of my life and I can’t see entering into it either. Coffee and tea ya well up until about 10 years ago I didn’t touch either of them but of late I can take or leave coffee and well tea’s never been high on my list of things to drink even of the herbal variety.

I’ll debate with the harmful or addictive substances since I can make the argument that meat, dairy and other products that people consume can come under that statement (to which I know many will disagree with, but remember each is to their own in that definition of addiction since trying to get people to stop eating meat or consuming dairy isn’t easy not when the one side almost always says “but humans NEED meat” or “but humans NEED dairy”), since people with an addiction do not have control over what they are doing, taking or using. Their addiction may reach a point at which it is harmful. Addictions do not only include physical things we consume, such as drugs or alcohol, but may include virtually anything, such abstract things as gambling to seemingly harmless products, such as chocolate – in other words, addiction may refer to a substance dependence (e.g. drug addiction) or behavioural addiction (e.g. gambling addiction) thus consuming meat, dairy, even aspartame could come under this big time if the person who you are talking to it about agrees that they couldn’t go X period of time without having it.

Needless to say that last part to which was talked about went over their heads to various degrees it seems, since they both disagreed with my view point on the matter (as stated above), their best answer could have been to agree that it can be classed as such but they disagree with that classification – doesn’t make the answer right or wrong, but it does acknowledge that my own point could well be valid (but I know that they are not likely to think along these lines, they are still young and experiencing life).

Near the end I was asked “have you given though to your own testimony” and in truth nope not given it any thought what so ever, mostly because I haven’t got a clue about that side of things. I understand the idea of testimony in general, and have of course listened to those who have talked at church and everything. But from my own end of it, sorry my brain draws a blank and I in all honesty can’t answer the question because I have no words to do so in the matter (maybe close to the date or the like I will, I don’t know). Though I do know that a lot of things can happen over the next month and change, but that some areas my brain just won’t let go because I’m always questioning things that I come acorns or am around, because its part of my nature to ask why!

My understand is that you are suppose to say in the first person your experiences and relation to Christ and God and the like, how both or one has helped you to know things or something to that effect. I really don’t understand it fully, I do have an idea about it but for my own end of things I can’t yet relate because for my own self. I know a lot of things are true and I know that there are many paths that people walk that all end up at the same destination when all is said and dun, yet I also know what N has told me in regards to the church and the mormon religion say on that matter being that they are the one true church on earth. Which to me is what every church says, my own idea is that ya they may well be but like all things you have faith and that is where it all starts.

Well post more as time does pass, take care everyone!



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