Welcome to the August 2012 edition of the Childfree Times, this is a collection of articles, videos, images and more all related to being and living a Childfree life by choice (and for some not so much by choice to start with).
Articles and Blog Entries
Baby Or No Baby: Couples Can Hit Roadblocks When One Wants a Child And One Doesn’t There’s a whole host of things that couples should discuss before making a life-long commitment: finances, housing, employment, health insurance, etc. But the decision to have — or not have — children should be at the top of that list.
Airplanes without the screaming! One in three travellers say they would pay extra for a child-free flight According to a new poll, one-third of Britons would be willing to pay higher fares if it meant a child-free flight.
I Never Wanted Kids. You Did. Ss What? We’re Both ChildFree. There are two kinds of childfree people. Those who are often referred to as “childfree-by-choice” are those individuals who have chosen to remain childfree for any number of reasons. Those who are often referred to as “childfree-by-chance” always thought they wanted children and had planned on having them, but never did, also for any number of reasons.
On Sterilization & Future Regret A recent Slate article by Bryan Lowder, titled “Sterilize Me, Please: Why Is It So Difficult For Women to Get Their Tied?” gets at one of the most frustrating experiences for many childfree women who want to choose permanent birth control. …
Child-free and Happy I do not want kids. I never wanted kids. Even as a kid. Don’t get me wrong: I’m really happy for my gay and lesbian friends who’ve always wanted kids and who now have them. I like children; often find them fascinating, cute, and cuddly; and have nieces and nephews I adore. I just wouldn’t want to spend a lot of my time raising them, and though each of us could master things we might think we couldn’t, I don’t think I’m particularly well-suited to it. Why do something just because you might be able to do it?
Child-Free Emotions A few weeks back I posted I’m Not Having A Baby about the reasons I have not had children. Some of those reasons were chosen by me and some were a matter of circumstances. In that post I promised to come back to this issue and talk about how I feel about all this. Since then I have to admit I have been procrastinating. I know how I feel but putting it in print is another thing. But I was spurred into action today because I was confronted with the image below on my Facebook news feed.
Way To Go, Mom! (End Sarcasm) So apparently these days it’s perfectly acceptable for kids to act like dogs and mark their territory. When I read this I almost did a spit take. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I read that! What kind of mom lets their kid get away with such an obscene display, much less congratulates him for it?
I’ve gone from Child-Free to confused and I’m now I’m grossed out In the break rooms at work, over lunch, next to coffee pots or in store aisles while shopping for high gloss paint, I have proclaimed with unwavering conviction to at least a hundred people: “I never, absolutely never, want kids.”
living childfree: ignoring the naysayers when did you first know you weren’t interested in having children? what was your reasoning for choosing a childfree life? I *thought* I always wanted children. It had been ingrained into my mind, of course, that that’s just what you do. Get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. No one ever posed anything different when I was younger, and any couples my parents knew who didn’t have kids (and were deemed childLESS, not childFREE by everyone) were pitied and it was assumed that they couldn’t have kids – not that they DIDN’T WANT TO have kids.
50 Reasons Not To Have A Baby 50 reasons by a parent NOT to have a baby, some of them are actually interesting reasons when you know the post is written by a parent.
Child Free by Choice Even in the 21st Century, there is often a peculiar reaction, mainly from people with children. If I respect their rights to add to the planet’s population, why can’t they respect my decision not to?
Why I Don’t Want Children Every few weeks, I have some kind of encounter that makes me reevaluate my intention to never have children. The most recent example occurred this past Saturday, as I sat in a coffee shop working through some serious writer’s block. A toddler barreled past my table and began to scratch the chalkboard with his tiny fingernails. Shrieking on the inside, I looked at his mother as she lifted him up, scolded him and deposited him in a chair, which he weaseled his way out of half a second later.
Childfree I didn’t want to take the chance of passing down these goddamn genes. My genes. The ones that my mother and my father have so graciously bestowed on me. The genes of addiction, of depression, and of an eating disorder. The DNA that manifested itself in twisted and destructive ways; cutting my forearms and my belly, and multiple suicide attempts — all have left me with the inability to sustain a physically and emotionally intimate relationship.
Are you Ready To Be A Parent? The recent baby battering case of the late two-year-old Tanaaz Sayyed has been inevitably compared to that of Falak, another two-year-old for whom constant abuse and violence proved fatal a few months ago. Investigation in the former case is still on (though an anonymous call allegedly blames her parents for the burns, cuts, branding and swelling); the story of Falak’s recurring domestic violence at the hands of an abused adolescent after the infant was abandoned by her parents was unravelled here). Following Tanaaz’s demise, a daily ran a story reporting that Maharashtra has the dubious distinction of the highest number of murders of those aged below 10, and that domestic violence has been responsible for some of these deaths.
On The Childfree Changing Their Minds About a year ago, I asked the childfree to write in their answer to this On-the-Ground question: What childfree stereotype have you been subjected to most in your life?” I did the “top 10? things people wrote in about, and the #1 thing people said is the same as what I have been getting a lot of email from frustrated childfree recently…
10 More Reasons to Not Have a Baby As if you needed more reasons to not have a baby, I’m tapping Scary Mommy this morning for a few reminders why some of us opt to remain childfree.
Choosing a Childfree Present My husband and I decided to marry when we were young, young enough to still be considered young today. We had an intimate wedding ceremony with only a few close friends and relatives. After all the formalities, we rocketed off into the married life of two, plus extended families on both sides. We both agreed that we were not going to have children during those beginning years, so for a delicious few years we enjoyed each other’s company to the fullest.
Essays from the Childfree & Parents on Their Big Decision I always find it charming when people on this blog ask me for advice about their own decision. Namely because I couldn’t think of a person less qualified to dispense it.
We say no to babies and yes to NYC …“I realized I wanted to be a writer in New York City,” says the 33-year-old East Villager, an editor for the career women’s site The Grindstone. “That changed everything. I wanted a life that sparkled. I wanted a life that wasn’t conventional. My sister, who’s two years younger, is married and has two kids. I just look at her life, and it’s really my worst nightmare.”…
Childfree: Truly Happy or Simply Justifying a Poor Choice? I’ll never forget a conversation I had with an older woman during the time I was writing my book, Complete Without Kids. As I told I her about my writing project and excitedly mentioned the details of a chapter on some positives about not being a mom, I was taken aback when she suddenly said, “Ellen, me thinks thou doth protest too much!” For the non- Shakespeareans in the Psychology Today readership, this quote from Hamlet refers to times when a person appears to be passionate about something but they’re actually feeling just the opposite.
Religion and childfree In my experience, it seems as though the more religious someone is, the more they believe that everyone should share in the joys of child rearing. Sadly, I have often felt uncomfortable in church because I am truly the only one there who is single and does not have “a family of my own.” I get asked more questions at church than anywhere else about where my husband and children are, or when I will have children.
Groups and Sites
The Childfree Choice A community page for people who have made the decision to remain childfree. Respect and civility are a MUST to participate on this page.
Childfree! a Tumbler page dedicated to all things child free
Images and Video
Happyly Child Free For Life another pinterest board dedicated to all things childfree
Childfree another pineterest board dedicated to all things childfree.
childfree another pineterest board dedicated to all things childfree
Childfree woman vs. Mother
Great post! Thanks for including our post from WhyNoKids.com in your 2012 childfree roundup. We keep your blog on our “must read” list and look forward to more thought provoking posts in 2013. Happy holidays.