Relationship Red Flags
Kristina de la Cal
A happy, healthy and balanced relationship is one that consists of mutual respect, open and honest communication, and a genuine appreciation for one another. Of course no relationship is perfect and there will likely be days when you and your partner get on each other’s nerves or make mistakes but in a generally healthy relationship, these set backs should be few and far between.
Regardless of how blissful things may have been in the early stages of a relationship, it’s not uncommon for things to change as the novelty wears off. The deeper you get into a relationship, the more likely you and your partner are to show each other your true colors. Ideally, those colors would be just as beautiful and vibrant as those that initially drew you in but unfortunately, this is not always the case.
Sometimes it’s easy to feel trapped in a volatile or potentially dangerous situation with someone that you may be intimately involved with. If you are unsure about whether or not your relationship would be classified as unstable and/or unhealthy, it is imperative that you be willing and able to recognize the relationship red flags that may be waving right underneath your nose. Take a moment to objectively analyze the relationship red flags presented here and try to be realistic about whether or not any of them might apply to your current situation.
Red Flag #1 – Physical violence.
There is never any excuse for physical violence in a relationship. If your partner has ever been physically aggressive or violent in any way, a serious problem exists and needs to be addressed immediately. If you do not have any friends or family members that you feel comfortable confiding in, then make arrangements to speak with a professional or with the authorities. Your life may very well depend on it.
Red Flag #2 – Sexual, mental, verbal or emotional abuse.
Just because you are intimately involved with someone else does not give that person the right to pressure or force you to engage in behaviors and/or sexual acts that you are not comfortable with. Being subjected to any kind of behavior that berates, demeans or otherwise mistreats you is a very real indication that there is a problem in the relationship.
Red Flag #3 – Dishonesty and frequent misunderstandings.
Open and honest communication is a vital part of healthy relationships. A partner who lies to you, misleads you or fails to communicate openly with you is simply not worthy of your affections.
Red Flag #4 – Controlling behavior.
Controlling behavior can take on many forms. Your partner may try to dictate what you can or cannot wear, how you should behave and where you can or cannot go. Perhaps your partner tries to discourage or prevent you from pursuing outside interests or attempts to isolate you from family and friends. Remember that romantic partners are supposed to support each other rather than own each other.
Red Flag #5 – The negatives outweigh the positives.
If the bad is outweighing the good in any given relationship, then it’s time to re-evaluate the situation and make whatever changes may be necessary to either tip the scales in the right direction or find a way to safely free yourself from the relationship in question.